Ugh, sniff, and ouch!
Greg and I had our first fight today, in two and a half years. I am not very good in arguments, I usually (always) end up crying out of frustration. In fact, I am not very good at hiding my feelings at all. I am an open book. When I am upset, or bothered people know right away. My voice wavers, my eyes mist up and I end up blubbering.
Which I did today, sort of, although not to the extent that I normally do.
I guess I am just frustrated with Greg in general. I feel like we have an 80/20 relationship, in where I do 80% of the planning and work around the house, and unless I write a list for Greg, things just don't get done. I love Greg for more reasons than I get frustrated with him, but I just feel that he has let himself go, and is just 'too' comfortable, because I have been too easy-going. I come home from work and his buddies are over. They drink beer, play x-box, watch baseball, do all those guy things that guys are supposed to do, but I'm just getting tired of it. It's like I come home from work, and already I know that there is someone else over, who likely hasn't had dinner and is going to mooch. Which I wouldn't mind so much if Greg did his share of the grocery shopping and funding his friends appetites. I do my 8 hr shift, go grocery shopping, come home, and the guys are there. I don't have anything against them, I just don't really want them over as much as they are. It seems like Greg is a permanent fixture on the couch. And today, it has really pissed me off. I'm worried about the trailer, he figures it'll get fixed in time for the season. No real planning, just that it'll get done. No planning on how we are going to pay for the repairs, just that we'll find the money. Can you tell that money has become an issue?! I'm not always good at words, and to make a long story short, I think I basically called him a lazy, irresponsible, beer drinking, fat bum. Not in so many words, but that's probably how he took it. I just need him to show more responsibility and better judgement. He seems to think that I am making a mountain out of a molehill. But, I don't think so.
Anyway, we were supposed to go to a one year olds birthday party today, and Greg just ended up storming out, with the gift in hand. And I am left at home to clean and get ready for a dinner party that I am hosting tonight.
Can I tell you how much I am not in the mood? Time to listen to Neil Diamond full blast.